If you are looking to how to make peace with your past, you are not alone. Many people have let the past hold them captive in one way or another. This is because they let the past determine any choice or decision they make in the present. So many people are not living their lives fully because they are afraid of repeating past mistakes.
When you let the past define your choices today, you will not enjoy the life you have, and you might not notice the pleasant experience you might have now. You might not let the past go, but you can make a decision not to let it define you today. The following are how to make peace with your past:
If there are any mistakes you made in your past, you need to forgive yourself. You must realize that forgiveness is one of the initial steps you must take to try and ultimately heal from the past. This does not only apply to yourself, but you must also forgive others.
Anyone who you feel that they did you wrong, no matter how bad it was, whether they ask for this forgiveness or they do not. You can visit them and tell them that they did you wrong and you forgive them nonetheless. Remember to do this even if the person is no longer alive, whether it is a parent, sibling friend, mentor, role model, teacher, or anyone else.
You might get advice from many people to forgive and forget the past. It is not easy or sometimes possible to forget about history, but you can choose to forgive. There are times when one has done wrong, and it continues to hurt each time they think about it. When you do not forgive yourself or others, you will not heal from it. Learn to make peace with what has happened and ask for forgiveness or forgive those in the wrong.
You need to accept that anything you did in the past or when you were younger will forever be a part of you. With the knowledge that you can never run away from your past, you can take steps to recover from it no matter how bad it was.
Some of the things might be too painful to remember, but by accepting them, you will be able to take steps to make peace. Take your time and figure out what happened and agree that you will not change anything about it. This way, you can finally accept the past and let it go. This is because the past sometimes leaves people with permanent scars.
Many people hold on to experiences from their childhood or youth, and it keeps them from growing and becoming better people in the present. Most time, these experiences are unavoidable and were not their fault. By accepting that you cannot do anything to change what happened in your past, you can finally face a positive future.
Find Something Good about the Past Experience
No matter how tiny or small it might be, you need to ask yourself and find out any good that came out of the traumatic experience you had. What lessons did you learn and what would you have done to change it. If you have kids, you can use this to teach them about past mistakes.
If the past was not your fault and you feel that other people should be held responsible, then you can use this as a basis to treat other people better. If you were abused as a child, you could use this horrible experience to assist any other child that is going through the same ordeal.
There is always a silver lining, and some pasts are what shape people to become what they are in the present. Make a positive change from the lessons you learn and ensure that you do not repeat the same mistakes. For example, if your father was an alcoholic, you do not have to use it as a crutch, but you can learn from this and build a better present and future for you and your family.
Make a Change
It is vital to use the past to change the present and the future. Just because someone in your past did something wrong does not mean that you should do the same. If your parents were not acting the way you would like, this is an opportunity to make a change and become a better parent. Teach your kids what your parents never taught you and treat other people the way you wanted to be treated. Whatever you decide to do, do not let the past define who you are.
Convince yourself that you are a much improved individual. You might ask yourself how to make peace with your past in a healthy way, but not many will apply measures to make this happen. You need to ensure that you take a firm stand to change the present or the past will always haunt you. Do not let the past contribute to any decision you make today.
When you have tried everything, and nothing seems to work, it is time to seek help. Help can be from a professional counselor or a mentor or even the church if you are a believer. Most people recognize that there is a higher power, so this might be the time to seek help if you need it. Do not be afraid of looking for someone to help you get over past pain or mistakes. You must realize that many people have gone through similar ordeals or even worse.
If you share your past experiences with others, you will be able to get the worst feelings off your chest. You can find a support group of people with similar cases and share them with others. Sharing will help you heal and get over anything that you have gone through. Do not isolate yourself because you will not get the help you so need when you are all alone. Get yourself some company and try to work through your issues.
Let Go of Negativity
Sometimes the only way you can learn how to make peace with your past is by letting go. It means that you need to try and let the past go so that it does not influence you in the future. It also means letting go of past friends and acquaintances who have a significant impact on what you went through during that time. If you need to move from a town or a state that reminds you of your painful past. Move elsewhere even if it is just for a while.
Hold on to the present so that you can let go of the past quickly. Do not be afraid of moving to a new hose and starting all over again or burning up photos or even giving away clothes. Get rid of anything that will continuously remind you of your pain and make a better future for yourself and others around you. It is surprisingly easy to make new friends, and you might appreciate the new positive people. When you are healing from the past, you will not need anyone or anything to remind you of it, so let them go.
You can practice meditation and breathing so that you can forget about the past. Many people become angry and volatile because of their history, and it affects everyone around them. When you realize that you get angry quickly, you might want to take a minute and breathe so that you do not overreact about issues. Enroll yourself to a yoga class and find peace or learn to breathe when you need to. Learn a few meditation exercises so that you can do them at home too.
Meditation is not only good for your healing process, but it is also great for your body. You can also do a few exercises to help you, and this will also keep you busy. When you take care of your body, your mind will also be healthier. Make time to meditate every day for a few minutes, and this will improve your moods.
Focus on Your Future
The healthiest step you can take to make peace with your past is to focus on what is coming ahead. Whether it is a new family, a kid, a new job, or even an original career path, you need to direct your attention to your future. You must believe that the past is gone and there is nothing you can do to change it. Stressing over what has happened is not healthy, and it will hinder you from becoming better in the future. Focus on your plans so that you can grow and get over the past.